Antediluvian Confidential

I'm a mess. I was looking at how one claims the prize if one were to win the lottery this morning, and as I was reading the process, I actually thought, "Wow. This is hard. Do I really want to have to do this if I ever win?" I was honestly thinking I might turn down tens of millions of dollars because there was paperwork and a public interview. The hell. I hate my job - but rather than go through the process of hunting for a job and enduring interviews and outright rejections, I've been sitting numbly through years of unhappiness. The hell. I know I need to fix this shit, but there's a lot of deeply grooved passivity going on here, and there's nothing more comfortable than a rut.